What an amazing feeling could it be?!
Well yeah, I definitely feel it from time to time. Have you ever heard a sentence “once my big heart will kill me”. So you know what I am talking about…
I have learned to say no for a long time ago now… It makes my life easier and protects me from unnecessary drama and conflict which I am not into at all. Sometimes, I still put others above me and in the end, I am the one who hurts the most.
People should respect your decisions and your actions. The problem is people like playing around and makes you feel bad, just because something is not happening as they wish. What they don’t see is actually they are the reason why you are not following a used pattern anymore.
If you call someone to go out and they always say no because they have company, after a while, you won’t call them. Then when they suddenly feel alone and want to go out, you just don’t want to be their safety net.
If you want to stay somewhere but there is always drama there, you won’t feel the urge to go there anymore. The others – of course – don’t know why it is and you don’t want to hurt them, so you are the selfish one then. Anyway, even if you try to explain your reasons, they are never true.
I am sure you have many other examples, as we all have. It is extremely difficult to follow your decision and not get into a fight with someone, but for your peace, you need to set up boundaries and made it very clear what is your end of it. If they understand it, it is fine, if not, you might need to create a bigger distance from them.
People who respect you will understand and respect that you are an adult with your own decisions and they never will blame you or hurt your feelings for it.